Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
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