cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Randomize
