so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
