A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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