yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
