Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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