i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
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