I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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