they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
