oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Drunk is not a location!
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
