and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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