Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize