The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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