oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
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