I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
