So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
