He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
