i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Randomize
