Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I licked your asshole in confidence.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
