I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
