at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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