now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
