Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
