were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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