You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
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