Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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