and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
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