I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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