I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Well I just put wine in my tea
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
