Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
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