The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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