He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
