True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
