We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
