he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
