we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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