im drinking this country out of the recession.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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