I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
