no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
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