We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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