And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
