Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Randomize
