dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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