he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
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