so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
