I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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