I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
