Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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