Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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