i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
