the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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